01 December 2007

Some Days



There are days (I am sure that most of you can relate) where this picture says it all! That is precisely when I want to say "CALGON" WHERE THE F*CK ARE YOU???

I love my kids and I love my husband but I do miss my freedom. And when I say freedom I mean not responding to the endless "mom"; the PTA meetings; the school volunteering; the "work" activities that you need to attend; the "what's for dinner?"; the "I don't like this."...and I could go on and on for days.

What is the solution we ask ourselves. My personal solution has to do with medication, alcohol, music, a "friend" and some batteries or "working out at the gym". Now these keep me sane!


Is anyone else with me here???

18 November 2007

What is the best?



So often everyone asks...so what is the best seller???



When you purchase items do you like knowing that others have enjoyed the product? I am not just talking vibrators here...think automobiles, cell phones, insurance, stocks...

I would have to say that personally, a good recommendation always helps sway me one way or another.

If a friend likes their cell phone provider am I going to run out and sign up with them? Maybe, if my contract is up and I can get a good deal.

What about if a friend loves their gynecologist? Do I quickly get an appointment with "Dr. Spreademwell"? NO!

Then why does it matter which vibrator your friend has? Do you think that if it pleases her, then dammit, it must do the trick for me too. It would be nice to get that same "O"utcome wouldn't it??

After selling "toys" for over six years now, I certainly am discerning about what I like and dislike in my "vibrating friends, as well as the lotions and potions that help to get the job done.

So maybe then it does influence our decisions. Positive or negative images are planted and we already know if we will like something or not without even trying it.

Well, here they are...the list you have been asking for...the top sellers...my favorites...


1. Flower Balm Do you want an "O" every time?? That's all I need to say.








2. Coochy- no, not the slang for your "vagina"! A fabulous shaving cream to eliminate those hideous red bumps in the bikini area.


3. Eros Bodyglide Lubricant. Talk about putting KY to shame!?! No comparison whatsoever. This is the BOMB. Imagine liquid silk...smooth, sensual and soft to the touch.









4. Silky Sheets Do you have to deal with that damn wet spot??? Somehow it is always on my side. Do I sleep on a slant or something?? Anyway, this stuff absorbs moisture. That's right, spray it on "the spot" and it will absorb the wetness and leave a freshly scented talc. Try it.



5. Cuddles- no, this is not your grandmother's toy poodle! This is a good basic cockring for both partners to enjoy.


6. Impulse Micro Arouser now this cokring goes above and beyond the call of duty. I have been told that it has saved a few marriages. Now isn't a $60 cockring less expensive then a divorce attorney??? It's worth a try!






7. Rabbit Pearl The name itself reminds us of Sex in the City. Do you remember the episode. An intervention had to occur because she would not leave her bedroom! I can understand how she feels.


8. Five Minute Erotica This book of short erotic stories is perfect to get things heated up in a flash. How about a little light reading to your partner before you pounce on them???


9. Silk Touch Egg This is the modern girls version of "the bullet". This egg shaped "massager" is ribbed and coated with a soft silicone. The patterns and intensity of vibrations this little egg offers will leave you wanting an "egg" every morning for breakfast!

10. Decadent Indulgence Yes it one of the fastest orgasm giving vibrators around. Hummingbird flapping its wings and flickering its pointer just for you. If you have a minute, you have an "O"! You don't have a minute you say, well then apply some Flower Balm and I bet it will take less than that to find the "O". Can you beat the record??? Why not give it a try!?!







Well, I hope this list helps you make some "BIG" decisions.



It's getting late so I have to grab my Five Minute Erotica book, apply a dab of Flower Balm and a smiggen of Eros, then reach for my Decadent Indulgence. I have less than a minute before I fall asleep!




All in a days work! (Research is a hard thing!)

10 November 2007

Getting Your Groove Back

You know the days...
alarm clock does not go off (dammit!);
car won't start (piece of sh*t!);
270 is like a parking lot !?*##!?;
lunch appointment cancelled after an hour late (what the h3LL! Have you heard of an f'in cell phone!!);
you get a note home from kids teachers (Johnny needs to keep his hands to himself...you envision a sexual harassment suit in the making!);
you burn dinner (call Dominos);
do homework with the kids (am I smarter than a 3rd grader??);
do laundry (where are those missing socks?);
vaccuum (damn dogs- dust bunnies keep multiplying!);
give kids a bath (now I am soaked!);
brush teeth, say prayers then put them off to bed.
BREATHE...now it is your time (or is it??)

You take a hot shower (with some Lavender Hemp Seed Bath Gel);
rub yourself down with some soothing Lavender Hemp Seed Body Lotion;
throw on your granny panties follwed by the rattiest flannel footie pjs you have;
hop into bed with a good book (How To Get Your Groove Back);
open to the fish eared page and then.....
your husbands invades your side of the bed and starts the groping!!!
What the h3LL??!! Does he not know how my day has been??? The last thing on my mind is some "action"!
Knowing the inevitable, I reach over into my "top drawer of the nightstand". You know "the drawer". I grad my ultimate favorite product...no, not the Rabbit Pearl, no not even the Decadent Indulgence...
the FLOWER BALM!!!
(Whoever invented this sh*t deserves the Nobel Peace Prize.)
Take a two finger swipe and rub it gently on "the spot".
Within moments, your senses are aroused.
A "Peppermint Patty" sensation of sorts...think cooling, tingling, warming...

Oh yeah, in the rat race of the day, I forgot that I am a sexual being who deserves pleasure. That's right! You deserve pleasure too!

I would have to say that 9 sessions out of 10 the result is the BIG O!

Now, he is relaxed, rolls over and falls asleep.
I am satisfied (thank you Flower Balm) and now I can read that book about getting my groove back.

Maybe I need to write my own book..."How Flower Balm Helped Me Get My Groove Back".

Here's to Flower Balm Ladies. Guaranteed to delight you or your money back!!

Let your Flower bloom...

18 October 2007

Sometimes all we need is a good giggle!

You know the days...where everything seems to go wrong.


Is there such a thing as waking up on the wrong side of the bed?? Even though I roll out of bed on the same side every day I would have to say...yes!



So what do you do when there are days such as these???


Be grateful for all that you have and remember that so many others have it much worse. I thank God daily for what I have and ask to understand and accept whatever it is that He has thrown my way.



After being grateful...you need to giggle. That's right, watch a funny movie, listen to a comedian, read a book of jokes or talk to a friend that makes you laugh. It actually takes more muscles to frown that to smile. So save those face muscles and smile dammit!



Smiles are contagious. So smile at someone that you are pissing off; the Walmart clerk who is disgruntled, the McDonalds worker who clearly is unhappy to be where he is, or the guy who clearly has road rage because he is "SO IMPORTANT" that he needs to ride on the shoulder to get to his destination. That's right smile a big teethy one and I guarantee it will brighten someone's day as well as your own.



Some days are strickly for giggling, so revel in them!



Until next time-



Gigi

19 September 2007

"Giggles and Moans" OH MY!

You heard it right...Giggles and Moans.

I think I know what Giggles and Moans are individually but together?? Not sure but it sounds like fun!

Yes, I like to giggle- at funny jokes; when tickled; when my kids are laughing; when something is just a bit naughty...

Yes, I too moan on occasion--when I am in pain; during an excrutiating workout at the gym; during a massage; and of course during certain intimate relations.

Are you curious yet?

Check us out online...http://gigglesandmoans.com

Until next time..enjoy giggling and moaning however you make it happen!

Michelle aka Giggi Giggles